During election seasons or when societal issues are debated, conversations can become intense. This can sometimes cause stress and anxiety in children who witness these discussions. Older children and teenagers may start forming their own opinions, which might differ from those of their families, leading to disagreements. Hearing news reports can also spark their curiosity and lead them to ask complex questions.
However, this period can also be an opportunity to teach children about our government system and the importance of civic responsibility. Here’s a guide to help you navigate these political conversations in an age-appropriate way.
Understanding Democracy and the Importance of Voting
It’s understandable for parents to avoid talking about politics with their children. However, it’s beneficial to introduce them to the concept of democracy in a way they can grasp. You can explain that just as there are rules at home, there are also rules for society, and voting is how we choose the people who make and enforce these rules.
“We live in a democracy, and instilling a civic culture of paying attention, knowing what’s going on, and participating in your choice of government is something that even young kids should be able to understand at a basic level,” experts say.
Start by asking children about the rules they see in their daily lives and how laws affect them. “What do kids need to be healthy and strong? Where can they safely ride their bikes? How fast can cars drive? Who decides what healthy foods are served at schools? Do they need health insurance to see a doctor?” These questions can help them understand how laws influence their lives.
Ask your children what good laws for kids would be. Encourage them to think about how they would make positive changes if they were in charge. This early engagement can help them understand the democratic process and make them more likely to vote when they turn 18.
Discussing Values and Political Beliefs
Political beliefs are rooted in personal values, so start there. “A healthy conversation about politics should include a discussion about values,” experts advise. “As members of a community, we get to make decisions about who we think is most closely aligned to our values and is going to pursue the best things for kids and families.”
Framing politics around values makes it easier to discuss what choices or policies seem fair and moral in a way that children can understand. “By encouraging your kids to think about what they believe is fair and just and how they contribute to their community, you can connect political participation to their own values,” experts explain. “Then you’re helping them understand the impact of their actions and fostering a lifelong engagement with the issues that they care about.”
Remember, children will eventually develop their own opinions and make their own decisions. Parents need to step back and allow them to grow into independent thinkers. Differing opinions can be a healthy sign that children are thinking for themselves and developing socially and emotionally.
Modeling Healthy Conflict Resolution
Parents often try to shield their children from disagreements, but hiding conflict can be harmful. Instead, model healthy conflict resolution openly, especially during politically charged times.
“Disagreements and conflict are a normal part of being a kid,” experts note. “People have different preferences – and deeply held feelings – about what policies are best and who the elected officials should be. That’s OK, and we have to come up with a way to talk it out.”
The key is to model respectful disagreement that doesn’t belittle or discriminate against others. Show children that it’s possible to have positive interactions even when opinions differ.
Here are some talking points to use in these situations:
- “I feel this way about this topic, but I’m curious to hear your thoughts.”
- “I’ve never thought about it like that before! I’m not sure I agree, but I want to hear more about why you feel that way.”
- “I’m surprised how strongly we disagree about this. Let’s change the topic for now and come back to it later.”
Emphasize the importance of hearing other perspectives, even if we disagree. Curiosity can reduce defensiveness and encourage thoughtful discussion. Remind children that no one is always 100% right or wrong.
Encourage children to accept and respect those who think differently. “Lean into the fact that we don’t always have to agree, and that disagreement can be healthy as long as we manage it appropriately,” experts advise. “That’s true whether we’re talking about two people on the playground or different factions in a community.”
Staying Informed with Trusted Sources
Parents play a crucial role in teaching children how to make informed decisions. Share the news sources you trust, explain why you trust them, and show them how you came to that conclusion. If they’re old enough, teach them how to research answers and seek balanced opinions from various sources. When political discussions at school become heated, encourage them to ask open-ended questions, check sources, verify facts, and form their own understanding of the issue.
Explain how social media algorithms can amplify conflict and show them how to identify influencers with vested interests. Discuss how different people and groups can disagree about what is true, making it difficult to form an opinion. Walk them through your critical thinking process to help them decipher their own beliefs.
Engaging in Civic Duties
“Kids can’t vote and they can’t donate to candidates, but it doesn’t mean they can’t help or get involved in other ways,” experts say.
If civic engagement is a family value, watch candidate debates, read news stories about ballot measures, and discuss candidate positions on important issues. Take your child to events supporting candidates and encourage them to ask questions about what the candidates will do for kids, schools, or youth mental health.
Children can also write letters to the editor, contact political officials to express their concerns, team up with friends to address issues they’re passionate about, or get involved in student council at school. Older children can participate in youth advocacy organizations, such as the Colorado Youth Advisory Council or UpRISE, which focuses on tobacco control and social justice. Parents can model involvement by advocating for child health in public policy. Kids aged 16 or older who are eligible can take advantage of pre-registration.
Political participation, in any form, can be empowering. When children feel they can make a difference, they are more likely to stay engaged with social issues throughout their lives.
By following this child’s guide to politics, you can help your children understand the importance of government, civic responsibility, and how they can make a positive impact on their community.
