Meditation, often touted as a stress reliever, a method for triggering relaxation, a blood pressure reducer, and a cognitive enhancer, has been integrated into Western culture as a practical coping mechanism. It’s increasingly presented not just as a supplement to psychotherapy, but as a substitute. This trend, like the past overreliance on Prozac, is concerning. People often seek a quick fix, a simple solution that promises instant results.
However, simply dissolving the self temporarily isn’t enough to resolve deep-seated issues. If it were, overcoming challenges would be much simpler.
Emotional content requires acceptance; otherwise, it remains unresolved, waiting for an opportune moment to surface disruptively. Addressing underlying emotions is crucial for true healing.
Letting go, even when you believe you are correct, is a valuable skill. Many of us are unaware of when our egos are influencing our actions. We tend to justify our opinions and expectations, hindering personal growth.
There is a unique and invaluable experience that occurs when a therapist listens without judgment or bias. When they cease trying to demonstrate their intelligence, and instead enter a state of relaxed alertness, genuine healing and understanding can take place.
Feelings can simmer beneath the surface, influencing our behavior in ways we don’t fully comprehend. Naming these feelings can often diminish the need for compulsive actions driven by those emotions.
Sati, meaning remembering, is a core component of mindfulness. Right Mindfulness, or Right Sati, involves remembering to observe oneself. Its opposite is absentmindedness – the forgetting that happens when we are lost in our thoughts. The essential quality of mindfulness is its ability to remember, becoming self-sustaining once established. Presence of mind is a more descriptive term for sati.
As one therapist shared, “I never use the word ‘mindfulness’ with a man in Oklahoma. People just don’t like the sound of it.” Instead, he advises them to “Go outside and close the door. Stand there and listen. That’s enough.” Sometimes, simplicity is key to accessing inner peace.
It’s possible to overemphasize mindfulness, becoming fixated on its form rather than engaging directly with the insights it reveals. Attachment to the practice itself can become a hindrance.
Clinging manifests in various forms, and the desire for inner peace can be as neurotic as more apparent addictions. The yearning to lose oneself, despite good intentions, can mask a mindset rooted in self-criticism and self-deprecation. Often, it’s just another attempt to find a secure refuge, replacing a troubled self with something seemingly perfect and invulnerable. Getting over yourself requires confronting these underlying issues, not masking them with idealized versions of self.
Ultimately, the goal is to approach life’s challenges with equanimity, not to eliminate them entirely. Getting over yourself involves accepting challenges as opportunities for growth and learning, fostering resilience and inner peace.
