Many mothers find themselves juggling countless responsibilities, often feeling inadequate, overwhelmed, or guilty. It’s time for a change. This guide, inspired by Sarah Bragg’s “Surviving Sarah” podcast, focuses on a powerful concept: a mother’s guide to raising herself.
The realization that the qualities we desire for our daughters—self-worth, body positivity, and tenacity—are often qualities we haven’t fully cultivated within ourselves can be a turning point. Are you truly practicing what you preach? This self-awareness can be a catalyst for personal growth, undertaken alongside raising your children. As Sarah Bragg emphasizes, one of the best things you can do for your children is to actively work on becoming your better self!
But how do we instill the same positivity in ourselves, as adults shaped by life’s experiences, as we do in our children, who are still so full of potential? It comes down to three key steps.
1. Get Curious:
Introspection is the foundation. What truths do you readily apply to others but deny yourself? Take time for deep, honest self-reflection. Document your thoughts. Journaling can be a powerful tool to process emotions and prevent them from being bottled up. Explore the discrepancies between how you treat yourself versus how you treat others. Are you quick to forgive a friend’s mistake but harshly critical of your own? Question these double standards.
2. Name It:
Once you start to understand your self-perception, ask the tough questions. Why do you feel this way? What experiences or beliefs have shaped your negative self-talk? Is it based on fact, or is it a distorted perception? Identify the root cause of your insecurities and self-doubt. For example, did a childhood comment about your weight contribute to current body image issues? Naming these underlying factors is crucial for addressing them effectively.
3. Replace It:
Once you’ve identified the negative self-perceptions and their origins, actively replace them with positive affirmations and self-compassionate statements. This is not about ignoring flaws, but about reframing your internal dialogue. For instance, instead of berating yourself for burning dinner, remind yourself that you are doing your best and that is enough. Practice self-kindness. Replace “I’m the worst cook” with “I’m learning and improving every day.”
Raising yourself alongside your children is an ongoing process. It requires patience, self-awareness, and a commitment to personal growth. By getting curious about your inner world, naming the root causes of your self-doubt, and replacing negative thoughts with positive ones, you can cultivate self-worth, model healthy behavior for your children, and ultimately become the best version of yourself. Start today. Be kind to yourself. You deserve it.
